Funniest EXO “Overdose” tweet just became funnier because…
he wasn’t even into K-pop and started getting tweets but all them DP’s made him think they were Korean.
Then he started replying and even asking questions
And he was serious yo!
"yixing, you got the stuff right?"
"awhhh shit, i didnt bring it."
"dude why you LYIN! I SMELL IT!"
"all right all right… damn! merry christmas, happy birthday whatever muthafuckas…dont ask me again"
(suho singing in the background: he. got. the. weed~ he. got. the. weed~)
"we love you so much yixing!"
"i actually brought it for myself. but kai turnin into the FBI and shit"
Suho - Bad Boy (Written By S.O.K)
Suho: omgggg guys look I found the coolest coin ever on the street it’s an 600BC quarter isn’t it so cool
everyone: *chatter chatter*
suho: guys manager hyung is calling all of you!!!
everyone: *chatter chatter*
EXO - Martial Arts (Written By S.O.K)
*In the kitchen*
You: ugh I'm so hungry why isn't there anything in the fri- oh hey Kyungsoo
D.O: helloo you look beautiful today
You: oh thanks
D.O: *inches closer and stares intensely*
You: ......ok I'm gonna go now
*In the dorm room*
You: what the hell??? Where's my shampoo I just bought a new bottle
D.O: oh sorry. The smell of it just reminded me so much of you, I HAD to have it
You: ummm WHAT?
D.O: isTHERE A PROBLEM
Extremely creeped out, you go to buy new shampoo when you run into Tao and an idea pops into your head
You: Tao! Listen, kyungsoo's been acting really weird lately and It's really scaring me. I wanna learn to protect myself and- TAOO can u stop looking in the mirror and listen!!!!
Tao: ugh so what he's into you big deal. You think I have time to help you? I have to go yell at my stylist because LOOK! She parted my hair on the COMPLETELY wrong side of my head am I supposed to walk around like this
You: I'll buy you whatever you want if you help
Tao: kris already does that
You: I'll shower with you
Tao: kris already does that
You: when people doubt your martial arts skills, I'll tell them you once did a triple flip kick in the air
Tao: why don't you just tell them I was a really good teacher
You: you probably won't be
Tao: I probably won't be. Ok let's start. The first thing you have to do is...kick!
Tao: ugh oh my god I can't deal with this u suck
You: well tell me how to do it right!!!
Tao: no u just suck there's no hope
Kris: ayo wassup wassup wassup guyzzzz. Whoa what're you guys doing, martial arts? That's so my style. I'm pretty good at that stuff myself.
Tao: you don't even have the proper form you have to-
Kris: honestly Tao just because your good at one thing doesn't make you that special ok i can diss you in 3 different languages so gimme some respect
Tao: at least I can take good selcas
Kris: get out. I CAN teach her.
You: uuum look guys I just want some basic stuff in case I have to defend myself ok don't start showing off or-
Kris: I CALL THIS ONE THE MEGASWAG BACKFLIP 3000 and-bleugjasbsaaaggghhhhhhh!!!!!! *trips and hits his head*
You: how did you just trip
Kris: it's a really complicated move ok
You: I'm pretty sure you tripped before you even attempted it??
Kris: I'm pretty sure you need to shut the fuck up . I'll start with something simpler for an amateur like you. This is the fist pump like THIS !
*bangs knuckle against dangling light*
Kris: SHIT AAGGH NO ....OMG OMGOMG NO ITS BLEEDING NO ITS BLEEDING AAGHH NO PLS I CANT ITS TOO ...TOO....Too *faints*
Tao: *high pitched* aaaaaagghhhhhhhhhhhhhh noooooo kris oppaa!!! No pls no
*Tao cups Kris's face in his hands and a tears begin to fall*
Tao: I need to get him to the infirmary
You: ok it's actually just a cut and I haven't even learned one thing yet
Tao: oh mygOd you are literally SOOO selfish are you really thinking about yourself right now when kris is so gravely injured?? Ugh I'm taking him bye
You: (left alone) wow I knew this would be useless
D.O: oh hello jagi
You: um nO fucKity BYE
D.O: oh i don't think so. There's something I've wanted for a long time 😏. I was thinking of asking you but...at this point I think it's gonna happen whether you like it or not ohhhh yea this is gonna be so much fun.
D.O: come with me to the movies noona I really don't wanna go alone again
Sehun - Too Cool (Written By Chai)
You were walking the halls of SM, when you saw him. Sehun. Your eyes lit up, and you ran over to talk to him. You really wanted to be his friend, but his "2 kewl" swagger always got in the way.
You: ayyoooo sehunnie wuzzup
Sehun: *stares at you*
You: so, wanna hang out
Sehun: because im fire and you are an oven
You: what does that even mean
Sehun: it means im too cool for you
You: wouldnt that mean you're too hot for me
Sehun: shut up
You: why can't we be friends
Sehun: look at me. i am the maknae of all maknaes. u cant touch this
You: Sehun. I'm going to win you over. At whatever cost. I can be cool too. Just watch
You walk away a few feet from Sehun, and bump into Kris.
Kris: woah watch your step
You: *ignores him*
Kris: Hello? Can you hear me..?
You: go away peasant
You: shut up bitch im too cool for you
You kick Kris in the shin and walk away.
Sehun: marry me
Chanyeol - Thug (Written By Chai)
Chanyeol: Jagi. Help me.
You: sure oppa what do you need
Chanyeol: be honest... am i thug
Chanyeol: I am, right?
You: Well, oppa-
Chanyeol: *big laugh* OHH JAGI YOU'RE SO CUTE
You: you're not very thug when you talk like that
You: why do you want to be thug anyway?
Chanyeol: I'm EXO's rapper. I can't have other idols disrespecting me because of my street cred
You: what street cred
You: okay...so what do you need me for?
Chanyeol: I need you to become my hoe
Chanyeol: every rapper always has a lot of girls around them! how can i be thug when my girlfriend isn't even a hoe
You: uM i will not be your hoe...but I will help you become a thug. First, you need to take that bandana off of your neck. you're trying too hard
Chanyeol: no no jagi, they hide my hickeys
You: EXCUSE ME
Chanyeol: *leans in to whisper* i don't really have hickeys. i just want people to think i do
You: why would that help you
Chanyeol: i need people to think i have bitches left and right
You: you don't. the only girls you hang out with are me and your sister
Chanyeol: *pouts again* jagiiyaaaaa, do i bother you :(((
You: thugs don't use aegyo
Chanyeol: well then how do they get hoes in the first place
You: it's the glare in their eye. the look that tells girls that they're a bad boy. the look that makes you wonder...will they strangle me? or will we make sweet love
Chanyeol: why do you sound like you know a lot about this
You: i read a lot of fanfiction
Chanyeol: about me? :DDDD
You: no. about kyungsoo
EXO - English (Written by Chai)
You: ok guys, it’s time for another english lesson
Kris: uM do i really need to be here
Kris: no offense but i think ive already mastered english
You: oh really
Kris: yes. didnt you know i’m canadian
You: fine. show us your english…
EXO & BTS (Written by Chai)
*EXO and BTS in a room together*
Suho: hello fellow idols, nice to see you again
Suho: so…you know… we are doing a bad boy concept soon. we’re gonna be so cool
Rapmon: oh, really? that’s cool. what are you guys doing?
Baekhyun: you know,…
Kris - Love (Written by S.O.K and Chai)
Kris: jagi wazzuppp
You: kris im not your girlfriend
Kris: howz it hangin, wats crackin, whos poppin
You: can you go away im trying to enjoy my lunch
Kris: i think i love you
You: im pretty sure you’re gay
Kris: why would you think that
You: you moan every time tao walks by you
Kris: ok gay or not have you seEn that man
You: ok great now leave
*kris shoves his face 2cm from yours*
Kris: look at them
You: look at whAt
Kris: my eyebrows arent they seductive , sometime i look in the mirror and im seduced by my own eyebrows
You: pretty sure you’re the only one that thinks that
Kris: no, tao tells me that all the time
You: what, when you shower with him
You: ok then go seduce tao im busy
Kris: busy what, eating your lunch
You: kris i swear if you say what i think you’re about to say-
Kris: lunch isnt my style
Kris: what? it’s exo’s catchphrase
You: no it’s not
Kris: yes it is. i have a lot of influence in my group, everyone follows what i do. im a trendsetter
You: thats not even true
Kris: then why am i the leader
You: didnt you bribe the company
You: ok listen i dont care why you’re the leader or why you’re the ultimate trendsetter i just want to enjoy my lunch
Kris: is that canadian bacon
You: this is rice it looks nothing like bacon you just want to talk about canada
Kris: what? ur soooooo racist. so i cant talk about my home country? what the heck jagi
You: dont call me that
Kris: it’s destiny
You: it’S creepy
Kris: girl, id like to sing you a song to express my love
Kris: O CANADAAAAAAAA
You: go away
Kris: im beauty. you’re fire. we go along so well, dont deny it
You: that makes nO sense
Kris: dont be afraid to love. open up your mind jagi.
You: kris i have a boyfriend
You: it’s henry
Kris: canada nOOOOOO how could you do this to me